Judith “Jude” Samuels
Jamaica

I grew up in Jamaica, a paradise in the Caribbean with beautiful weather, great reggae music, and the sounds of roosters crowing when you wake up.

Not many persons are aware that it’s a crime to be lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender in seventy-three countries around the world. In these countries, queer people can legally be put in prison, tortured or even killed. My home country of Jamaica is one of these countries.

I realized I was a lesbian from an early age. Even kids as young as eight are thrown out of their homes if they are lesbian or gay because the churches and a lot of the people in Jamaica are against gays and lesbians. Many of these abandoned children live on the street and wipe windshields at stoplights to make money to survive.

There was no one I could share my feelings with, as it was believed that one can beat, pray, or rape the gay away. All three forms of trying to cure me from the demon of homosexuality were tried. I was sent to church where hands were laid on me for my deliverance. I endured physical beatings from the time I was eight. 

Worst of all, I was raped multiple times starting at age 14. Many people in Jamaica believe that females become lesbians because they haven’t experienced sexual relations with men; hence corrective rape is one way of showing them what they are missing. I was also seen by a therapist, which of course didn’t help me change my sexual orientation. The therapist gave up in the end. This homophobic behavior in Jamaica goes way back to the slave era.

Coming to the United States, LGBTQ people are finally free to be out of the closet. I was a lesbian activist in Jamaica, but I decided to seek asylum in America after enduring beatings and death threats. 

While participating in a protest, some members of my community told me I shouldn’t return to my home. I thought it was an idle threat, but a few days later, the home I shared with my twin sister was burned to the ground. This only made me more militant in protesting for civil rights for LGBTQ citizens.

In coming to the United States, we are finally free to be trans, gay, or lesbian. We are finally FREE! And yet, moving to the United States was one of the hardest decisions I have ever made. To my great sadness, I had to leave my kids behind and miss out on the recent birth of my first grandchild. 

My kids understood the decision I made and supported me, as they knew that leaving Jamaica meant that my life would be far better. They knew that I had endured a lot because I was an out-of-the-closet lesbian activist.

Leaving Jamaica to come alone to freezing cold Massachusetts in winter was a bit scary. However, the transition over the past four months has been okay thanks to Pastor Judith Hanlon, co-founder of the LGBT Asylum Support Task Force. The Task Force is a ministry of Hadwen Park Church in Worcester, Massachusetts. It is a community- based organization dedicated to supporting and empowering queer individuals who are seeking asylum in the United States, regardless of their religious tradition.

I reached out and sent Pastor Judy a message on Facebook, and she answered right away. With her help and the help of the Rainbow Railroad, which funded my airfare, I left Jamaica in March 2017.

The LGBT Asylum Support Task Force currently helps me and seventeen other asylum seekers with housing and lawyers who guide us through the asylum process. The Task Force gives us a $400 stipend monthly to help with our expenses, and I’m applying for a work permit so I can make my own money. I have a strong case, so I believe I will be granted asylum.

I feel completely safe here in the United States, but I fear that the present administration will do everything it can to prevent LGBTQ asylum-seekers from becoming American citizens. I believe people should welcome and embrace people fleeing their countries because of their sexual orientation, as in many of those countries they can be imprisoned, attacked viciously, and even murdered.

I am a humanitarian. If I receive asylum, I plan to start my own organization for youth and the elderly living with HIV and AIDS. I also want to write about atrocities committed worldwide against LGBTQ people.